Making Friends

My son is longing for friends.  Boys to be exact.  He is almost four and has finally realized that he would like to play with someone who thinks a little more like himself.  Not that he doesn't like girls mind you, because he thinks girls are great, he's just looking for someone who understands the joy of making car noises while playing with hot wheels, or belting out a good dinosaur ROAR.

Unfortunately, as he was begging to play with Colby, his playmate of choice was busy having surgery.  So we roamed off to the park in search of other kids to play with.  We went to the park by the rec center out at SDCE.  I thought we had hit the jack pot because there were so many little boys at the park that day.

He went up to the first one and said, "HI, MY NAME IS JEFFREY, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?"
The little boy threw sand in his face.

He went up to the second one and said, "Hi, my name is Jeffrey, what's your name?"
The second little boy gave him a shove in the chest and ran away.

Now deflated, he looked back at me.  I must admit, it wasn't going so well.
He went up to the third little boy, and in a meek voice said, "Hi, my name is Jeffrey...."
The little boy just growled at him and went back to what he was doing.

So, I  grabbed him and left.  He had tears in his eyes and said, "Those kids didn't want to play with me."  I told him that it was my fault, that I accidentally took him to the "bad" kid park, but now we were going to the "good" kid park.  I drove out to Dos Picos and he drug his feet as we headed to the playground.  I saw another little boy about his age playing by himself, and a mom with an infant.  I encouraged him to try one more time.

He walked up and said, "Hi, my name is Jeffrey, what is your name?"
The little boy smiled and said, "My name is Justin."
I saw junior let out his breath.  No sand throwing, growling, or grumpiness.

"J is for Jeffrey",  Jr. said.
"J is for Justin", said the little boy.

Jr. was content knowing that this kid could appreciate the letter J, one of his favorite things in the world.
They went on to play nicely, and had some of the funniest conversations.

This is my favorite:

"My daddy builds houses, and schools, and playgrounds, and swimming pools, and...and .....TRASH CANS!" said Jr. proudly.

Justin replied, "My daddy builds robots and rocket ships."

"Does he build dinosaurs?" asked Jr.

"No," said Justin. "He can't build anything that eats."

Jr. nodded his head like that made perfect sense.

Then they both looked back to us, the moms, and I wondered what they were thinking.  Did they realize that their mom had "built" them, a person that eats?  I don't know what was going through each of their minds, but I do believe that in appreciating and bragging about their dads,  maybe they thought for a moment of their moms, too.  After all, I was the one who got him to the park, and I was the one who tried to be there when life threw sand in his face.  We can't fix everything for our kids, but we can show them how to pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and try again.

Unfortunately, I didn't even think to ask Justin's mom if she wanted to meet at the park again.  She wasn't terribly talkative, and maybe didn't need a new mommy friend in her life.  But I can tell you, I was really grateful that the universe managed to put us at the park at the same time.  Jr. needed that confirmation that he could make friends.  So, to Justin, where ever you are....Blessings to you little guy.  You made my little boy's day!